Earlier today our middle daughter, Hattie, had an outpatient procedure to put tubes in her ears and remove her adenoids. In the grand scheme of things it was not a big deal. We have been through this twice before. Hattie had her first set of tubes 3 weeks after her 1st birthday. Laura got tubes less than a year ago. Hattie breezed through and is already feeling and hearing better. No biggie. Our past experiences made today much easier for us as parents. This wasn’t the case when Laura got her pacemaker two years ago.
As many of you know, Laura was born with 3rd degree heart block. In lay terms, it is an electrical problem. The top and bottom halves of her heart do not communicate with each other about what her heart rate should be. She will have a pacemaker to correct this problem for the rest of her life. (I know that I am being overly simplistic. It’s easier for writer and reader alike, I promise!)
As parents, we have a heavy burden. There is a lot involved with raising children. It is an enormous responsibility to be “in charge” of the life of a child. In our house of girls there is a lot of drama and a lot of cleaning up – both physically and otherwise. Robert and I have gotten pretty good at managing the chaos. Some days are better than others and some days we’d rather forget altogether. But for the most part we’re successful…and busy.
When it was time for Laura’s surgery, we felt helpless. In all the things that needed to be done, the only thing we could do was get her to the hospital on time. Everything else was out of our hands. We handed over our 13 month old baby and were forced to put our trust in the staff of doctors and nurses. We had to have faith. In modern medicine. In others. In whatever is out there that is bigger than we are. In the unknown. In our daughter. In ourselves. It was not easy but we survived. Laura is doing great. She is a stellar patient and has amazed more than one cardiologist.
This morning when the nurse came to wheel Hattie back to the OR for her procedure, Hattie flashed me a smile and a little wave as she rolled down the hall towards the big double doors. I got that all too familiar feeling. There is some cliche involving heartstrings…it felt like a little tug. Once again, I was reminded of my deep and unending love for this little girl. And I had to have a little faith….
