waiting room four…

Earlier this week, Robert had shoulder surgery. It was not unexpected and went as well as possible. At the hospital, I spent every moment with him that I was allowed but that left me in the orthopaedic surgery family waiting room for roughly six and a half hours.

I have experienced and written about situations like this before. One particular time comes to mind when I was stranded in an airport. It is an amazing opportunity for people watching and the confirmation that our society is diverse in so many ways.

Human behavior has always fascinated me. Especially the people who glide through life without a thought to anyone else. It must be a gleeful existence for them. Just going along in their narcissistic way without a care in the world. It’s annoying as hell to the rest of us but, at times, so entertaining.

If you FaceTime your friends or watch videos on your phone at full volume without earbuds or headphones, you might fall into this category. Just saying….

Here are a few personality traits that were prominent in the waiting room this time.

Real estate hogs. They bring 15 bags of stuff with them everywhere they go and proceed to spread their belongings out onto every surface they can claim without noticing that there are barely enough chairs and tables to go around. 

Outlet hogs. Luckily this was a newer building so there were plenty of plugs but other places I have been were not designed for our modern life. This leads to jockeying for position by all those in need. There is often wheeling and dealing between strangers for use of charge cords and outlets. I have forgotten to charge my phone or laptop more than once but there seems to be a large number of people who regularly forget to charge their devices before going somewhere they might need it for an extended period of time.

Chit-chatters. I was alone so I wasn’t talking to anyone in particular but, when I am with others, I try to be respectful of people around me while having conversations. There was a man in the waiting area who was a nervous chatter. I can claim that title when I’m nervous or excited. This guy in particular had a high-pitched voice that was very loud. He started talking when we got there at 5am and he was still going when I went down to see Robert just after noon. If I could have found a lollipop I would have offered it to him without hesitation. He could not shut up.

Know-it-alls. These folks have all the answers. There was one woman in particular who could not wait to show people which hallway to take to the cafeteria. There was an ENORMOUS sign showing the way just above her head but that didn’t matter. The absolute joy she got from directing the weary towards caffeine and sustenance was palpable. She looked almost disappointed when she was called away from her post to join her loved one who was now in recovery. The know-it-alls are also frequently reporters. They can’t wait to report to the person behind the desk all the things going wrong in the waiting room. The people behind the desk hate reporters. You can feel it.

Snackers are particularly fascinating. Never without food in hand. Many of the moms in the room came loaded with snacks. You know the routine…goldfish, granola bars, something sweet, warm cheese sticks and maybe a little fruit. This was not a waiting room for children but the snacks don’t change as we get older. A hospital is no place for charcuterie. This is survival.

Hospital employees are their own sociology grouping. If you are patient, understanding and kind to a fault, please consider a job in a hospital. This is not me…I’m a quart low on patience on a good day. But I digress…Often, the patients and family members are at a low point. They need to be informed, cared for and helped through whatever hardships are at their door. This is no place for hostility. About 50% of the employees yesterday were of the patient, kind and understanding variety. By the time we left, it was obvious which employees had tolerated their maximum daily amount of stupid.

It is the large number of people who cannot seem to figure anything out for themselves who baffle me the most. It is almost as if no one told them to stop by the common sense department on their way out of childhood. Usually this runs in families. Which makes sense. Parents who lack common sense can’t exactly pass it down, can they?

All in all we had a positive experience yesterday. Our doctor and team of nurses were phenomenal and I survived the waiting room unscathed. Robert’s surgery was a success and we figured out the home ice machine for his shoulder. I’m glad the wait is over!